#3 ladies only - trust equals respect

quote / pic by thecrazytruth.tumblr.com

sometimes our own mind plays little nasty games with us, worst case scenarios creep around and surrender knocks heavily on our door. especially if we expect something nice to happen because someone told us so – it’s so easy in fact to run after it because we doubt that it will happen on its own or because we thought it would come around quicker.

i don’t really like to use the word desperation, no it’s more a sign that you don’t trust if you go running after it. a lack of trust is a lack of respect – if you can’t put trust into the smallest things he tells you then you don’t have any trust in him. respecting him means more than just accepting him as he is, it means that you give him your trust and won’t doubt his ability to stick to his statements or promises.

there are reasons why things don’t happen right away or at a time YOU wish for – but that doesn’t mean that they won’t.

knowing that they will happen is big and powerful because it shows your doubtless trust. people underestimate und underrate it all the time – “i love him but i don’t trust him, so i run after him. otherwise he will forget about me and will move on” wrong, wrong, wrong.

there is no love when there is no trust - there might be feelings but love requires earned and given trust. it’s true even when it sounds a bit weird:

“you may not trust someone you love. but you can always love someone you trust”

i would alter it a bit though because there isn’t any love without trust – simple as that. and trust isn’t given from the start, therefore love doesn’t happen overnight! love takes time as the trust grows you have and trust can only grow when fed right. so by running after him you show that he’s not able to match your expectations in your eyes – because if you’d actually trust him then you’d know that he’ll be there and won’t forget about you. that’s why there is no reason to cause a scene when things don’t happen according to your “timeline”, it would show that you lacked trust while you indeed waited! that’s the big difference between waiting, doubting, fearing, disrespecting & knowing, trusting, respecting!

no obvious evidence that he broke your trust? no fearful desperation needed until it’s proven otherwise! weak love will never build up a loving and stable home.

if you can bring up doubtless and genuine trust – then you carry strong love for him in your heart.

#6 inspired post

quote/picture by dapper_grandiose_fashion (instagram)


edit 04/14/2013: "you do you - i do me" and everyone's happy.

ok i don't need to tell you guys that it's obvious that some ladies are attracted by tall, tanned, short, asian, european or what the heck ever men. same applies for men's "game", some ladies are attracted by cocky, fucked up attitudes from jerks, douche bags or our well known "players" cause they are often super flirty, confident and all of that faked up shit -  fuck i'm laughing my ass off, but ok i know i curse too much, so back to our post. 

i honestly don't know if what i'm about to write is based on the fact that i saw "the one" or just because i'm kinda sensible for seeing the inner personality within shortest time.

whatever it is, in general i don't focus on looks or set up attitudes (can smell that a mile ahead) - if i get introduced to somebody or get approached i kinda sense out what this person is about. not like i'm judging i just feel the vibe. 

everyone of us has both an attractive side and a well.. not so attractive side about ourself. but this depends on who looks at them and such lesser attractive sides can make a person very attractive in fact - because they're just a part of them. a man who is aware of his habits/lesser attractive sides is authentic and therefor attractive to me. one might be shy, a bit insecure around you, has quiet a temper, ego or a hard time to focus etc - but this is him, nothing less nothing more - that's a part of his authentic character and if you love him then you also have to embrace these sides of him.

i don't say that you have to tolerate everything, although i hold back a lot lately because i consider the situation/mood etc but mr. big knows that i have temper too and that i'm not afraid to stand my ground. there are times when it just fits to tell somebody what's bothering you because you are able to express it gentle but clear, without leaving a side taste of offense. there is no need to change someone, just asking them to change HOW they do certain things in order to make you feel more comfortable - which, if he loves you, should be important to him.

don't want him in any other way - just like he is because either you take all of it or nothing at all and i want all of his authentic and amazing self because i feel comfortable with handling it.