#17 inspired post - demanding is key

quote by kingkravate (twitter)

there are different reasons why a lot of us women never experienced an orgasm - i'm not talking about clitoral orgasms, those can be attained within 3 minutes whenever we do ourselves - longer if our partner tries. 

key word - tries

why? no matter how good he thinks he is, every woman has different needs and her body responds differently. a lot of men forget about one thing: mental and emotional stimulation, without them i guess it will be really hard to make her experience a vaginal orgasm. chances to do so are much higher when she feels emotionally attached to you, based on what you have as a foundation and how much you stimulate her mind in general and during sex. but i think the main reason why a lot of women never experienced a vaginal orgasm is because they don't speak up about their needs - they don't dare to demand sexual satisfaction like men do - ok you can moan more or less when he pushes the right buttons but still, why not say what gets you roaring like a lamborghini murciélago v12 engine? why not use this as your own advantage to heat up his desire for you even more?

experiencing an orgasm and chivalry aren't that much different from another! you can wait and expect a lot of a man, but in the end he'll do you way better when you actually speak up about your needs and wishes! you can wait for him to do the first step or wait for him to take you out on a real date, not those half ass suggestions like "what you wanna do" - "hm dunno, you decide it's whatever you want to do" that might sound nice and you think he's just polite, in reality he's just damn lazy.  so instead of waiting around i advise you to read my other post about standing up for yourself - #11 inspired post - those half ass suggestions and half ass efforts we get on a daily basis aren't enough. you have to decide that for yourself, that you won't be satisfied with 50% - 60% or 70% effort - no.

i decided for myself that i deserve an honest, caring and ambitious man - who plans his life with me, around me, together with me.and that's exactly what i demand and i declared my need for that kind of secureness - realize, demand and make progress.

making our needs nd wishes known to a man is directly connected to our fear of rejection - that's why many don't do it. but just think about it, you really want to be with someone who can't handle your needs, who gets scared off, who runs away or corners up like a little pussy? see it as a natural process of filtering - i wrote about the importance of filtering before - in order to sort out time wasters so you are available for the right one. how bad would it be to realize that you missed out the right one because your delusional ass was busy with a lazy time waster who mindfucked your heart? so if you confront a man with your needs, and he runs away - wave after him and shout "thank you" because that way you saved your precious time in the very beginning. now that i learned from it, i don't have any problems dumping the wrong ones within seconds and most important: without regret. how many times did i get weak in the past, how many times was i scared to demand something, how many times did i look past stupid behavior just because i was scared to lose something - nah nah nah lose what? a stupid lazy fucktard who doesn't give a fuck about you?  i ran after a damn time waster for too long - but i guess my stupid ass was lucky because mr right was still there - just like he was before...

try it out and you'll see how things work out better - for both your mental/emotional and sexual needs - don't sugarcoat it, just be straight forward. oh.... i promise you, he'll love to hear about your dirty fantasies - uncensored -  he'll do his best to satisfy you the next time, just how you demand it. same applies for him being a gentleman around you, tell him what you demand and let him fulfill his male role of the provider - providing security, love and pleasure to the lady he loves.

#11 inspired post

pic by thecrazytruth.tumblr.com

true as my heart, packed with a lot, sparing it out on the floor - vulnerability became rare, disrespected and used. oneway ticket to a woman's precious garden, or even a roundway ticket? where do us women want to stand in life? right, on our own heels with a pretty smile inspired by our life, falls, wins, family, friends and loved ones - also by people who crushed our heart into million pieces, why? because they showed us where we never ever want to stand again, down under with our feet in the mud of sticky never ending back and forth issues. no, we standup proudly, knowing that we'll never settle for less than we are truly worth of. we won't bend nor knee, we walk along our life's path happily and if one man out of douzen steps out of his comfort zone and wants us to be his queen, then he'll walk with us instead of leading us onto his comfort path.

we own this, we inspired men to get back to their instincts of going after what they want and get it with the right effort. there isn't a king and his lady, there will be a king and queen - partners not worshippers. a weak mind will dimm the light of your heart, know your worth and the directions you are going after and let that outshine all the other temptations men are after. because at the end of the day you are a queen with flaws and sparkling facets who will never feel and especially act like a side chick, doormat or bottom chick - be yourself and let that be amazing enough for him to do his male job, proudly courting his queen. there might be many courtjesters dancing around you, be patient, do your business and look at him as he courts you, you'll notice him in an instant - because a king will win with actions not words.

- sarah jessica

#7 inspired post

quote / pic by dapper_grandiose_fashion (instagram)

 ▪ just like one says "knives, forks, scissors & fire aren't meant for little kids to play with" - a  lady should say "trust, loyalty, faith & emotions aren't meant for little boys to play with". a man isn't much more than a "grown up" boy - so he will play and mess around with the given trust & heart from a lady which are very delicate and easy to break, therefor you shouldn't give those things away easily - he won't respect and appreciate it in a proper way. what sets apart a gentleman from a man is that he indeed knows the value of your given trust & feelings that come along with his emotional interaction with you - he won't crave and run after the attention from other ladies by giving them his more than obvious attention. a gentleman knows that by doing so he risks to lose one of the biggest and most important things that glue the bond he has with his lady - trust, without that everything else will become more and more fragile. it shakes up a lady's self assurance and her view on you - don't be one more reason for her to doubt that true gentlemen still exist. If a man can't stay focussed on one lady at a time - in fact his lady that gave him her heart - then he should give it back and as he isn't a worthy gentleman any longer, he shouldn't dare to accept given trust & feelings as he doesn't handle them with respect. be a gentleman, take responsibility & show her that you are way more worthy than other men who crave for her - she chosed you to be the worthy heart & trust keeper - don't ruin it by pointless flirting & staring, giving away the attention she deserves, no other lady than her. be worth her trust and she'll give you much more in return - unconditional and faithfull love which is paired with admiration & affection only meant for you. ▪ - Sarah Jessica

edit for gentlemen: you shouldn't find yourself in a situation where you have to think twice if your actions are doubtful, especially when it might cause you to think "she won't notice it anyway" or "i'll simply delete it afterwards"- as soon one of these thoughts pop up in your head, that's a damn huge alert signal for you to doubt yourself!!!! because you know that it's not right!

before you interact with others, especially other women, consider at least one of the following thoughts that should run through your mind first - and i mean seriously first(!) everytime:

"if my lady would read/hear my conversation with that other woman on FB/IG/etc...."

• would i still say/write the same things
• would i still be that overly "generous" aka flirty
• would i still suggest to meet up at some time (omfg i cringe while typing that - fuck that shit HELLOO)
• would i still like her half naked pictures on FB or IG (that makes me go big chunky coconuts, seriously i fucking hate that)
• would i still send all those stupid smiley faces
• would i still need to delete my convo after that
• would i still complement her on looking so bangin hot (or whatever crap men write)
• would i still be able to say about myself that i'm a nice guy (no not because your lying to yourself and defending yourself that it's sooooooo super normal to write in that way with other women - no it's not - basta)  
• would i still show my own convo/txt to my lady (yeh that says it all)
• how would my lady feel when she heard/saw it
• would my lady feel disrespected
• would my lady doubt my faithfulness
• would my lady feel jealous about giving away my attention to other women
• would my lady feel sad about my flirty behavior
• would my lady lose trust and faith in me
• would my lady lose her precious point of view on me
• would my lady feel hurt  
• would my lady be able to be happy with me after that
• how would i feel if she did the same things with other men
• how would i feel when she is txting with other men behind my back
• how would i feel when she likes half naked pics of other men
• how would i look at her if she did those things
• would i trust her any longer
• would i respect her any longer

this is so simple in fact - if a big fat ass YES comes to your mind for at least one of those things i listed - then stop doing it!!! i'm not paranoid, of course we interact on a daily basis with our opposite sex - might it be at work or with the cashier, what so ever! that's not the point and we all know damn well what i'm talking about. don't act stupid and fool yourself! 

if you can count yourself a lucky man because you have someone special at your side - then please, do yourself a favor and think twice - 99% of the interaction with random women who don't have anything to do with your worklife/family etc is pointless and just flirty because you need attention and ego boost. as i said, if you can't handle to focus on one lady at a time, then you don't deserve a true lady who would give her all to you. and the bad thing is you know exactly what you can lose - but mostly you think you won't lose it. 

you are wrong.

and there are a lot of disrespectful things that a lady can experience, but she should never experience disrespect from you by actually showing her that you can do better with other women - and yes, that's the hurtful impression you make with your actions. and don't try to defend such cheap behavior with words like "it's just texting or it's just liking her picture, i wouldn't do anything in real life" - this is the real life!!!!!!!!!!! or were you dreaming that you texted her? fuck no - you were doing it, right here right now!!!! man up for your lady or sit back and let her have a real gentleman who appreciates her true value and knows why he's with her and not with one of the others - because she will make him happier than anyone else ever could. so please pay her respect and don't drag her public & personal self assurance down - it will make her look & feel stupid. whenever i see a man who's in a relationship and acts all flirty with other women it just makes me cringe and feel bad for his girlfriend - and THAT is something very important to us ladies, how others see our relationship and therefor "us" as our relationship represents a big part of ourself and yes it makes us feel embarrassed when everyone around us notices what kind of flirty douche bag we have. a lady wants to be proud of her man & her relationship, don't ruin that.     

if we just reflect for a short moment how our partner would feel about it, or much easier - how WE would feel about our partner's behavior - then we all would benefit from less frustration, disappointment & hurt.