#24 ladies only - men aren't thaaat bad

it's true, you got hurt - i got hurt - we built up walls but do we really blame it on men? yes we do mostly, and no it's not correct nor is it in any way right. it's not only about what we receive or are willing to receive - it's more about what we are willing to receive. and that's too much most of the time cuz it's so easy to blame, right? but what if we just take a closer look at ourselves? what if we realize it's also up to us to shut doors and abondon heartbreakers?

just think about door-to-door seller, they try to sell you their goods the best way they can because they want your money. but it's you who decides what to buy and what not. ok i was lame at that cuz i used to buy every shit - literally - i bought a key tag for 80 chf just because i couldn't say no. hilarious right? buying a 80 chf key tag you really don't need? but i did and so did you - you didn't buy the key tag but you bought all these lies, hurt and resentment. not because you are stupid - ok some of you are - but you bought it in first place cuz you just couldn't say no. and that's ok cuz nobody's born perfect, right?! nobody's born with the attitude and experience of an alpha wolf female, so it's natural that we all go through try & fail situations in our lives. 

stupid are only the ones who go through fail after fail and still buy that crappy unnecessary key tag for 80 chf - stupidity won't last forever though but hey come one, you got better things to do with your life than continuing buying that crap. so what can you do to stop doing so? simply learn to say no. i know it's hard to say no cuz you fear to maybe overreact or blow a "chance" - but infact it's a win win situation - first of all it improves your confidence because that way you show gut and stand your ground - hey it really feels good!! trust me you'll feel so strong and more confident - second it safes you a lot of time. i see women from 20 - 30 in their most blooming years (biologically) so why waste that precious years on someone who isn't worth it? it's your own fault if you let the same guys run over you again and again cuz you hope the new guy won't be as disappointing as the others.

it always takes a good mixture of confidence, sanity, and understanding to say no - there's a difference between setting boundaries and simply releasing your inner "bitch-kraken" - just saying no to everything that doesn't match your expectation and cutting off guys isn't what makes you a happier girl. love requires compromising and compromising requires maturity, maturity to seperate "that's just what i want right now and i don't give a fuck if you understand it or not" and "hey let's talk about it, it makes me unhappy for so and so reasons, how do you see it. it makes me feel so and so, are you aware of that? if yes, are you able to compromise for me/for us? if not it makes it hard for me to get along with you and we need a common ground"

common ground is the key word - everyone has different ways to see things - that's good and necessary - but there needs to be common ground to start off together. if you and your boyfriend don't have common understanding and furthermore respect for eachother about how you interact with eachother, how you interact with other girls/guys outside your relationship, how you trust eachother and where you both want to stand in 5 or 10 years - then there's no future path for you both to walk on. see? that's why you need to learn to say no -> learn to speak up about what you are all about.

#inspired post - adorn

These lips can't wait to taste your skin, baby, no, no
And these eyes, yeah, can't wait to see your grin, ooh ooh baby
Just let my love
Just let my love adorn you
Please baby, yeah

You gotta know
You gotta know
You know that I adore you
Yeah baby

Baby these fists will always protect ya, lady
And this mind, oh, will never neglect you, yeah, baby, oh, baby
And if they try to break us down don't let that affect us, no, baby

You just gotta let my love
Let my love
Let my love adorn you
Ah, le-le-le-let it dress you down

You got to know
You gotta know
Know that I adore you
Just that babe

I... oh oh
Let my love adorn you baby
Don't you ever
Don't you let nobody tell you different baby
I'll always adore you
You gotta know know
You got to know know know
Now yeah

Ooh, yeah
The same way that the stars adorn the skies yeah (every night baby)
Oh, look up suga (every night baby)
Now, hey, hey, hey
The same way that my whole world's in your eyes (in your eyes baby)
Ooh, and this time now (and this time baby)

Just let
Let my love adorn you baby, hey
Le-le-le-let it dress you down
You gotta know, baby
Oh, you gotta know
Know that I adore you
Oh, love aint never looked so good on ya
Ooh, put it on baby
Let my love adorn you 

since this song came out it was my all time favorite song - it just had something i could really identify myself with. it's somehow hard to explain why and how but the first time i heard it it just sank into my soul and heart. like it became the melody of my heart, the beat it was beating to - adorn by miguel - whenever i heard this song it gave me chills, it set me into the mood of love - more than just making me horny it made me taste how love tastes eventhough i couldn't taste it back then.  things in life aren't always rational and furthermore you can't know when they'll happen - unexpected joy is the best in my opinion. 

IVLG hit 10000 - big thank you

didn't check the hits for a few days and baaaaaam - over 10'000 hits. it's not a biggie but thinking about it makes me happy and yes, a bit proud cuz when i first started off with my blog i never thought so many people would read my shit.

from the first post till now an evolution took place - jess 1.0 was a sweet, innocent, naive girl who lost herself in neverending romantic thoughts - jess 1.0 was drunk on her emotional whore trip. by writing post after post she learned, assessed and faced life's ugly truth - pain, disappointment and anger can open one's eyes if they are willing to stop running after the white rabbit that leads to an unreal place and keeps you stuck until you get devoured and spit out. jess 2.0 was born and she wasn't the same as before, she was more confident although things didn't go as she wished for, she was happier than before because she empowered herself by writing uncensored, knowing she could write about anything she wanted to and wether others hated or loved it, she wouldn't stop cuz it just started. jess 3.0 came to surface, appearing tougher, more outspoken, and def facing reality - writing about things others not dare to talk about in public cuz they fear the reaction of their friends or other people. i don't because that's what makes my blog so authentic - a fearless speaker is an honest speaker - it seems to be more aggressive and people misinterpret me as some ghetto chick, interesting aspect - men see me as ghetto like - that's a perfect example for the double standard. however, it's not about dissing - the way i write is the way i talk to my bff or other close people - i feel comfy talking that way cuz that's me, it's not enough to talk about things i need to add my sense of drama and wit because i like to make people laugh. topics and  problems are hard enough to handle, why not combine it with a dry sense of humor?

fact is, i'm still somehow the same girl at heart, romantic, cheesy, i tend to blush, i giggle weird, i curl up like a kitty cat, always hoping that things turn out good, happy ever after stories - but i'm more cautious cuz i learned from past mistakes. jess 3.0 is an alpha wolf lady and no one will fuck her over again. she is aware of her past and she is able to make the best out of her future and damn she won't fuss around with those stupid nonsense problems "why doesn't he call" yada yada yada - thank god, thank you irony, thank you insanity, thank you genius, thank you fucktards, thank you inspiration - thanks to my readers and most of all thanks to that guy who cursed my pussy. no need to censor, no need to hide, no need to turn angry again. it's not about the reason why i started my blog, it's about the reason why i keep writing.

#23 ladies only - handling fucktards

oh those desperate fucktards - fucktards everywhere - believe it or not, men can be even worse than women when it comes to spread rumors or start trippin cuz one of those creeps couldn't get a bite of your pussy cake. they don't really need you to hit that bat hard in their face - just a cocky look here, a turn down there or maybe the fact that you didn't greet his stupid ass and voilà - we have egg omelette. did you ever wonder where they come from?! all of a sudden you have an army of fucktards in your garden, peeing on your roses like dogs - sniffing their own shit after unloading their obvious wack ego-diarrhea. oh so lovely, smells like "man my ego is busted lemme stroke that shit by making her look like a whore".

Imma be like ...

especially when you hear shit that is obviously so dead wrong and false that it gives you chuckles - i can tell you one thing - if men make the effort to talk bullshit about you eventhough you don't know them really well or you didn't see them in moooooonths - you def crushed some eggs baby. high five on that - if you're on a hate-trip then spill it out, but if you start shit after years (?! like wtf is wrong with you) or months then i wonder what you do at home when you are alone? do you grab my pic, jerk off and hide in the corner crying cuz it sucks to depend on your hand? maybe you are just tired of miss p(orn) and all pussies which are available ain't shit? it doesn't really matter whose eggs you put in the crusher and pressed "10" - fact is they are either bored or try to cause a shitstorm in your personal life. never underestimate the bro love among men, it doesn't matter if 8 out of 10 guys wouldn't say shit about you, if 2 guys out of the "gang" feel the need to go after your sexy ass and make you look like a whore so they have an ego boner again - trust me the whole pack will be after you.

ladies, if you know that you didn't do anything bad and know that the rumors are false - don't investigate energy in sniffing out the ultimate shitter. although doesn't it say if you kill the ultimate boss vampire you kill all of his suckers that he infected? well that sounds alluring right, but don't involve yourself at all, beside that you'd only feed their thirsty dicks you'll look even more "guilty". just sit back, relax and smile bright like a motherfucking diamond the next time you see those fucktards. the less you try to fight them the less funny it is for them - you have nothing to hide nor to fear.

i must admit it strokes my own ego lol cuz none of these thirsty wannabes got a hold on me and instead of stunnting around like they own the world with their wack sneakers, wack beards which make them look like creepy pedophiles, cheap ass whores who suck their dicks in a row cuz they are so fame hungry - remember sharing is caring - just look at them this way: they swing around their dicks for every whore to suck or to fuck, those wackos won't pull diamonds out of coals, they live a wasted "yolo" life and those are exactly the ones who'll settle for a basic bottom bitch - because at age 40 none of the sane alpha ladies will waste their time with loosers like them and all they bang is young pussy (who'll get bored of your old dick after you fucked her a few times) and when they finally get a girl to settle down it will be one of the girls from the good old days back then who used to deepthroat all of their homies.

sucks to be you huh

#22 ladies only - men love bitches

she looks fab, she's bad, she pulls men's attention like light does with flies so they buzz around it until they burn, she never runs out of men wanting to be with her (probably for fucking her anyways but that's not the point), she isn't all nicey nicey so she drops her potencial lovers within seconds, she has a cocky attitude , she is a bitch in the eyes of others - why the fuck are men so fascinated by her and keep chasing that bitch when you can't keep a man's attention and effort although you see yourself as every man's blessing? do you find yourself in situations thinking "dude, why can't you see with anything else than your avarage dick and see what kind of wifey-type i am?" probably continuing with "i'm different/my pussy rides cock like no one else/i'm like the creme de la creme/i'm not a basic bitch/etc"

well the difference between you and mrs bitch-who-pulls-more-attention-than-you-and-gets-the-guy is simple: she thinks AND acts like she is a big catch for no man to miss, if he does then she waves a big "get outta my eyeseight dude" sign. it is irrelevant if she is a nice person with a good heart or if she'd be a loving girlfriend who supports her man and cares for him - i bet most of those "successful" maneaters are drop dead wasted souls with no gut at all - BUT and here's what you should learn from those superior bitches: they might be stupid and cocky and all that stuff that would make you give them a high five with a chair but they have boundaries and furthermore they stick to them regardless if mr average knocks on their door or if mr omg-he's-hot does so. they treat every man equal, they don't allow themselves to unleash their inner emotional whore who ruins everything and gives you a free seat to destination "heartbrake", no they keep themselves in check and have clear dating rules.

trust me ladies, i'm the last one who likes cocky, narcissistic, stupid barbie bitches who show off nonstop - looking fab with their makeup 23/7, running around "naked" one hour of the day when they scratch that shit off their faces and look basic just like everyone of us does when we wake up. i dislike women whose minds are dry like the dessert, the only impression they can make is with their perfect outlook and the only concerns they deal with are "where did you get those high heels / omg why isn't my name on the guestlist" - but it's not about what you think of those girls, at the end of the day they attract more potencial lovers than you. don't panic you don't need - and please, really don't consider that - to transform into the next superbitch, you wouldn't feel happy with it in the long run nor your friends or family. no one likes fucked up bitches - not even men - they don't run after their cocky narcissistic asses, they get hooked because those women challenge them, they give them a great possibility to conquer something - men love to conquer! and it's not explicit about how long or how hard the conquest is, it's about "feeling" that there is something to lock down before someone else does because it seems so promising and great. maybe it's just that mysterious thing about those women because they keep those men at armslength emotionally and physically. as i mentioned once, having sex on the first date isn't a complete no go - it's about how you act afterwards.

let's have a seat, grab some icecream or wine - oh did i mention i prefer captain morgan - however, let's start with this overview where i compare mrs basic bitch with mrs bitch-who-gets-the-guy.

initiating via texting (whatsapp/fb/mail/etc)

basic bitch: initiates - texts him first almost every time
alpha wolf: doesn't initiate - texts him back equally to the amount he texts if not even less - isn't glued to the phone waiting for him to text

basic texting

basic bitch: texts more than he does - continues textshitting him even if he didn't reply to her last text - drowns him with smileys especially if he started sending those stupid heart smileys eventhough he doesn't know her really - texts him essays - texts back asap

alpha wolf: texts him back equally to the amount of his replies - doesn't continue texting when she didn't get a reply - doesn't send any of those emotional smileys - doesn't text essays - texts in a nice short way - doesn't always reply in an instant because she has other things on her mind

he doesn't call / he "disappears" suddenly / he becomes unreliable

basic bitch: texts him from time to time hoping things win back intensity - if he comes back after he didn't write her for a few days/weeks although he was supposed to answer her last text, she replies gladfully in an instant - doesn't question his intentions or why he disappeared without a word - tries to play it cool although she is disappointed somehow

bitch: doesn't run after him - she cuts him off completely because she knows a man who is truly interested won't disappear out of nothing 

just to name some differences between a basic bitch and bitch-who-gets-the-guy, i bet we were all in the role of the basic bitch at some time and where did it lead us? it lead me straight to a big heartbrake, to lasting disappointment, trust issues and lasting anger until today haha although i can laugh about it now - but the most important aspect of my big heartbrake: it formed me to a more cautious, more confident, more assertive, more selective woman - i'm like jess 2.0 - don't you think women of that 2.0 type don't get confronted with douchebags, all women get confronted cuz a man can't know in advance by only looking at you that you are now an alpha wolf and not some pink pussy shit anymore. but the main difference here is alpha wolf lady might get confronted but she'll draw the lines of her boundaries faster than that motherfucker can plan out how to get between her legs and pull the famous "hit nd' quit it". let's see it this way it's a win-win situation, she doesn't waste her precious time and nerves and he can move on to an easier prey.

men will knock on your door, no matter if you're a beta kitten or an alpha wolf, because men try, because men often are too lazy to find new pussy, so it's easier to go back to what they already had once or more - but it's your own choice who you let in. remember what you've been through till now, remember those times when you were waiting for him to reply and he simply didn't although he was online non stop (oh i had that situation too), remember those times when he dumped plans with you last minute, remember pain because there is a reason why we feel pain - to safe us from more unnecassary pain, to safe us from making the same mistake twice. i know it's hard for many of us women, but once you become version 2.0 you'll never go back.

it's not about becoming mean - men same as women hate stupid mean antisocial bitches - it's about reconsidering your behavior and learning from your mistakes. learn to draw lines, boundarie lines, around you and your heart - become somewhat of a diva without coming over as mean or cocky. don't be a basic bitch - i don't care if you think you think like a boss, work like a boss and fuck like a boss - that's just a wack try to stand out of the crowd but at the end of the day you weren't able to kick out his stupid ass, you run after him, you give too many chances, you open your legs and his friends know you are an attention whore who gets laid whenever you give that sheep some candy - don't be a sheep that gets fucked by the nasty farmer cuz that's what happens to sheep. 

#2 astrology - my blue print Part 2

Mars in Sagittarius

Mars rules our animal instincts for aggression, anger, and survival. Our sexual desires come under the rule of Mars.

People born with Mars in Sagittarius are usually wild cards full of surprises.  You never know what kind of tricks they have up their sleeve.  They are full of a lot of restless crazy energy. They are extreme adventurers always thirsty to try something new, go somewhere new, explore every aspect of the world. They are also deeply philosophical and always having moral dilemmas. They are a dichotomy.  They care very much about doing the right thing, but they also want to be free to do whatever they feel.  They usually are full of varied interest. They are never just one thing. They can be very conservative and traditional in one department of their life and an extreme radical in another.  They always have an amazing sense of humor though. They understand that laughing at life is the key to enjoying life. They tend to be very lucky people.  Their optimism tends to draw opportunities and they’re always happy to try them.
Mars in Sagittarius loves romance.  They love having sexual partners to share adventures with.  They love having deep philosophical conversations and wild passionate sex. (very very very much nailed how I tick - was lucky enough to experience this once in my life - my best friend can confirm that haha)  While Mars is in Sagittarius, he is always ready for an argument and excels at debate. While advocating for a cause is certainly admirable, during this time it is important to think before you speak. After all, the Archer is known for his bluntness, not his manners, and Mars passion is closely associated with Mars anger. Throw in some fiery impatience and you have the perfect recipe for hurt feelings, ruined relationships and perhaps a burned bridge or two. Mars in Sagittarius isn't known for patience. They are restless and adventurous. Physical activity is the best way for them to deal with anger. They always like to be busy, so they are constantly working on many projects all at once. They aren't known for their finished product, however. They get much more excited to begin something new rather than finish something old.


Jupiter in Cancer

Jupiter's position by sign in the natal chart (that is, the sign that Jupiter occupies in the birth chart) reveals how we express our generosity and tolerance. It shows how we go about trusting others and improving our lives.

Jupiter in Cancer individuals attract the most good fortune when they are sympathetic, charitable, use their powers to save and accumulate, and comfort others. Real estate and the food industry can be prosperous avenues. As a Water sign Jupiter, you have a strong belief in a higher power. You are most able to attract luck and rich life experiences to you through your intuition, imagination, and compassion. Helping those in need boosts your own morale. You've got a generous spirit that loves to feed, comfort and make others feel secure. You're gifted at creating a homey feeling wherever you go in the world. You sense the emotional undercurrents of a situation, and know when others are vulnerable. You're ambitious, and follow a path led by your powerful emotions and intuition. Your gifts translate well to deep healing and care; providing homes (from real estate to social work); business, artistic expression, high cuisine and food prep in general, remembering history and family.


Pluto in Scorpio

Pluto represents subconscious forces, ruling all that is "below the surface".
On the up side, Pluto is associated with renewal and rebirth. It represents endings and new beginnings, as well as spiritual growth and rebirth. Negative expression of Pluto is an obsessive desire for power and control and general destructiveness.

Early experiences may have led you to feel self-protective or to be secretive about yourself. A parent might have been secretive or ashamed, for example, and this pattern is deeply ingrained in your psyche. You might feel a sense of guilt for where you came from, even if most of you feels proud of your roots. A parent might have encouraged you to look beyond the surface of matters, and might have encouraged in you a love for psychology. A parent might have been very protective of you and attempted to shield you from negative experiences, and you subsequently grew to fear change. Or, your early experiences might have included a shocking, intense, or scary event that lives within you. Alternatively, you might have absorbed the strong fears or obsessions of a parent. Their emotional courage, deep understanding and the ability to face their own wounds as well as those they have given to others can create a strong person you want on your side.


Juno in Scorpio

Where you find Juno in your chart is where you may meet someone that you will remain with for a long relationship. She covers marriage, fashion and beauty. She is the patron of relationships and true love. Diplomacy is part of her sphere.

Juno in Scorpio needs an intense relationship with a lot of deep intimacy and sex. They may become manipulative and jealous, using sex as a way to control their partner. They want passion, loyalty and strength. They may be possessive, and must learn to trust over time. They like mystery and power. They may be demanding or high maintenance. Once they are won over, they are loyal and dedicated, though they may always be a bit suspicious.


Vesta in Pisces

Vesta brings out your purest potential and Essence into being.

Vesta in Pisces is dedicated to serving those in need. They may sacrifice themselves or show deep compassion in their service. They want to heal others. They hold their beliefs in high regard. They are spiritual and may be led into fantasy. They have an excellent imagination. They may not be sure of how they do what they do. They run the risk of not living in reality. They need to learn to awaken into themselves and connect the body with the mind and the spirit. 


Pallas in Aries


Where her influence falls is where you will find talents in the following areas.
With her spotlight on daddy's little girl, Pallas Athena will help determine how you interpret your relationship with your father, and in turn how you treat all males in general.

Pallas Athena in Aries charges in and tries to find the fastest solution. They get the action started for whatever purpose they need. They love competition and battle. They are innovative and inventive. They know how to mobilize the vital energy, whether it is for fighting, inspiration, artistically or for healing. They are pioneers. This is a good combination for artists, acupuncturists, homeopathy practitioners and athletes. Stressful aspects can indicate overly aggressive behavior and conflict with others. 


Chiron in Cancer

Everyone gets wounded in some manner. Whatever our wounds are, Chiron influences us to overcome our condition and go on.

Chiron in Cancer may feel like an outsider. They may feel unwanted, un-nurtured and unloved. On the good side, they are very nurturing themselves. It is difficult for them to let others care for them. They may give to everyone except themselves. They may end up taking in every stray that crosses their path. They need to learn to give to themselves and cherish their own needs. This helps balance them and make them whole. Opening themselves up to accept love and care from others is a big step towards healing that inner hurt. If they can learn to indulge themselves once in awhile, they will begin to realize what they have been missing all along.

#23 inspired post - second winter

it's falling down

isn't it peaceful

lingering on my calm mind

oh how calm and cold it is

every flake on my lips

and it tastes like you 

tastes like the coldest winter you are now

ain't tastin like the sweetest winter you ever had

licking my lips one last time to taste it once more

ain't tasting like your lips back then

i look up and all i see is how you rainin on me

covering me with sweetest foolish promises

running down my cheeks down to my neck

now stop cuz you ain't good for me

you can't have me one last time

cuz you had me too many last times

snowing down on me 

kissing my lips

caressing my face

lingering on my shoulders

oh so calm and promising

don't pull me back cuz there is no us

oh so quiet we turned

oh so right we turned

cuz there will never ever be a you and me

first snow came and as it fell i fell

like i fell for you 

over the bridge on my way to paradise

ain't no one told me i was going to hell

what a delightful hell it was

not hot enough anymore to keep me blowin up

as i walk down the road i look up

but now all i see 

isn't hell, it's heaven

cuz you not around to mess my head

not around to rain on me

cuz it's snowing and i lick it off once more

but i'm not tasting you

i leave those footprints in the snow

i'm leaving you

like i already did before

ain't no way you gonna give it to me once more

cuz jess gotta see right through

tasting winter's sweetest taste

and no, it's not you

don't be a fool, 

#22 inspired post - like herpes from the past

pic/quote by kushandwizdom.tumblr.com

once blinded, twice hurt, three times full of regret and four times more doubtful - five times a reason to get stuck in the past. you carry it with you like herpes, it disappears and resurfaces time after time and more than that you affect your partner - you don't have any bad intentions but you do affect them with your subconcious defence against everything that reminds you of what you once sacrificed and what broke your heart and ego.

there is nothing in this world for your partner to do to take away the pain, the regret, the traumata you went through and that's ok because there are two sides that need to be considered - on one hand it tought you a life lesson, to see with your heart and mind and not go through life with your eyes closed to whats real, to whats right in front of you - but on the other hand it turned down everything beautiful about something so wonderful, so precious. it's unfair at the same time, as you gave away this gift to someone who wasn't worthy at all and now that this person broke you into pieces you talk down this gift like it's your doom. you'd rather cut off your left arm than giving away this gift once more to the right person, just because the wrong person didn't appreciate it - what did they have to contribute what your partner can't? are you that scared or are you just plain blind?

no matter what happened, we all have our own burden to carry with us - if you can't see your partners value , how lucky you should be and that you should never let go of this once in a lifetime chance, no rather you wait for something better to come or have your rescueplan in your pocket in case it fails - then you are indeed blind... blind hearted. take off that blindfold so you can truly love.

#21 ladies only - trust no bitch

c'mon look at that laugh - ok silvie doesn't look any less evil but if you haven't heard it: her bff (on the right) is together with her ex husband (like wtf is wrong with you?!) and now she's preggo from him - hiiiiiigh five with a chair i'd say. deep shit friendship over here huh?! of course her ex isn't any better than her stupid bff.

however if they still get along or not - it's obviously: don't trust anything that bleeds once a months and didn't die yet! 

all women's vajayjays are as sneaky as the stupid bitch next door who you hate for pulling more attention than you ever received. unnecessary to mention that quality goes over quantity, remember? no one can speak for the entire humanity but trust me, being selfish, greedy and reckless is in our female dna - why? - we still have unconcious behavior from our ancestors from thousand and thousand of years ago, pairing ourselves only with the best male around so chances are bigger that the children will grow healthy and strong. they didn't give a fuck if they were sharing a man or if they had to ellbow bitchfight to get the best man - they wanted him and they did everything possible to succeed. no need to tell you how "loose" today's society is huh and that bitches still don't give a fuck?

people interact differently but i'm honestly not - let me repeat: n o t - a fan of sharing my man on any scale. sure others don't see it as a biggie to let their bf/gf go out with the opposite sex but c'mon why don't they see a problem with it? it's simple, if they don't tell you to not meet other guys/girls they are allowed themselves to do so without you havin a reason to bitch around. smart ass huh?! nah nah nah naaaaaah my dear - not with me - i don't fucking care if it has to do with trust issues or confidence issues, i give a fuck about my ego in that case so go ahead and call me jealous, needi or what - but i can tell you one thing: every man who contacts you or looks for a reason to talk to you or even see you wants something from you. wether it's flirting to push his wack ego or evening the way to get into your panties after he got you on his hook - ego stroking is even harder when you have a bf and the other guy succeeds with flirting or asking you out for a drink.

oh c'mon this whole "let's have a drink" especially with that stupid wink smiley - is the same as the old and almost forgotten "hey wanna come over and watch a movie?" aka "i wanna fuck...... oh sorry i mean love ... youhhuuu" bullshit - having a drink is just like a nasty "innocent" forplay before he or she tries to eyefucks you into his/her bed. as long as it's not the sister, mother or whatever kind of family member of your boyfriend, a girl with a dick between "her" legs or homosexual female - don't fucking trust her that she'll never even think about hooking up with your man. women are as thirsty for approval as men, getting positive feedback while flirting the last precum out of your boyfriend's dick is just as satisfying as when dude B gets you to flirt back, knowing you have a boyfriend at home. it's just about ego jerking - and you want to bet if it's only that or getting laid in the end?

so you say you don't care if it's only flirting - ok fine - but my ego in that matter is too big, i'm one catch of a woman and hell no i don't tolerate that other woman stroke their wack ego with the approval of my man. you have to see it this way, they abuse your boyfriend to get an ego stroke - they don't really care for him, neither do all the ego stroker guys care for you - all they want it to get approval from someone who looks good in their eyes. be the alpha wolf, be cleopatra or whatever you want to - other chicks using your man to get their pussies wet? hell no - they can try that wack shit with little pink princesses - we are godesses and a godess doesn't share anything but advice, money or food. i'm not one of those fellow weak beta kitties, so no, sharing is not an option.

but it's pointless when your man is a stupid douchebag whose ego is as wack as the one from bitch next door - so it requires a couple who both know where they belong and work as a team, so when your man has a problem with taking you with him on a "drink" with an "old friend" who has a vajayjay - dump him. i don't give my all, my heart, my soul, my life to a man who gives away ego stroking within seconds to another thirsty bitch - sounds plausible huh? it's called respect my dear, respect for the woman you love. and it's not enough to think you are queen godess if you don't tell your man how it works with you - i might be arrogant in that matter but i'm not a fool - it would be foolish to think that it's enough that you are the "baddest" around, no talk it out with your man, let him know your boundaries.

i'll never cause a scene because i know the toughest punishment for a man - walking away and leaving him back alone with his wack broken ego.

#20 ladies only - stupid and stupid match great

ok before i can't stop shaking my head and rolling my damn eyes until they stay that way and i end up looking like a retard - let me quote robyn's lyrics from her song "indestructible"

And I never was smart with love

I let the bad ones in and the good ones go

But I'm gonna love you like I've never been hurt before

I'm gonna love you like I'm indestructible

Your love is ultra magnetic and

it's taking over

This is hardcore

Ooh and I'm gonna love you like

Like I've never been hurt before

ehm no girl, this isn't hardcore this is deep down stupidity which reaches the core of your pussy and unfortunetely not your brain - oh wait sorry, robyn was right. this is ultra hardcore - hardcore stupidity which deserves a hardcore slap in yo vajayjay to wake you up from this pink pony fairytale shit trip you're on.

couldn't resist to use this meme generator muhaha

i know your new crush or your new boyfriend is super exciting and you go nuts whenever you see him, almost throwing your panties after him and praising him like he's a fucking adonis with his magic stick. new person, new love, new chances - i get it - but how come so many women who are new in a relationship let down their boundaries and allow the relationship to fail just because they let themselves get blinded by hormones or their itchy vajayjay? suddenly starting to doubt that he's not all about that good boyfriend-material shit, you thought he was in the beginning. they don't change over night, it's because you let them!

why? because you don't use your gained experiences from the past relationships, because you roll in like a toddler on his trycycle for the first time although you know that when you don't set boundaries and be careful it's doomed to fail, bullshitting yourself that he'll stay this courteous, charming, helping and generous as he is now - just because it's all new, exciting, romantic, cheesy and you are way too busy being in love with him. you experienced hurt from your past relationships for a reason and the reason is def not to experience the same shit again because you make it too damn easy for him to bend your boundaries and put you into a role you aren't comfortable in. men get used to routines pretty fast and as long as you don't change things, it's your own fault. why blame him for bending your boundaries? yeh it's hard and yeh it might come over as unfair but men should be man enough to prove themselves without whining how unfair it is that you don't throw your trust after them. trust is earned - because trust is one of the most valuable things in a relationship, you can't just throw it after him girl. but let me say that i'm very proud of my fellow superwomen who also chose to allow themselves to expect, you are on the right way. eventhough it means you turn down many so called "chances" ppfffff if they were real chances they'd measure up to your requirements. so don't be sad and don't get frustrated - you reached a point many women didn't reach yet. it will get better and it will be worth it, i promise.

you might have been hurt before, you might have been lied to before, you might have been cheated on before - so why the fuck should you love him like you've never been hurt before? oh he's not like that bla bla no he's different bla bla - let him prove! that would be blind, naive and plain stupid. you know i'm all about this cute romantic stuff but at the same time i keep my boundaries and principles. i don't drown my boyfriend with love or trust and whipe his ass all the way up so he feels mothered, because no - i'm not his mother, i'm his girlfriend. he knows exactly what i expect from him because i let him know, he knows that my trust and love is earned and not given freely - that's why he holds up his efforts which are genuine.  if he wasn't in for the homerun he'd be swinging his bat half assed with half assed efforts and i'd be gone in no time.

there is no secret or so - it's simple. don't be afraid to be alone - because if you are then you get desperate, easy to bend, easy to use, easy to replace - and no, you don't want that. learn from mistakes and hold your head up, no need to feel ashamed as long as you are willing to accept them and learn from them. men aren't that bad, who do you want to blame - the sheep for opening the door instead of keeping it closed or the wolf for walking through the open door? keep your memories close at hand because that way you won't make the same mistakes twice.